OkCupid | Melissa Hobley: How to Actually Communicate Well
Today my conversation is with someone who I think is one of the better communicators among marketers that I've ever chatted with.
Melissa Hobley is Global CMO of OkCupid (part of Match Group), and shares hers perspective on effective communication on today's show. I found this particularly interesting because a surprising percentage of my guests are...let's say, just OK at having a conversation. Totally fine, but not like "no wonder you're leading this multi-billion org" level. I think Melissa has that X factor.
We also talk briefly about things like how dating is evolving in 2021, public speaking as a skill and (as always) advice on how to carve your own avenues to authenticity.
Enjoy! Full transcript below.
FOLLOW AUTHENTIC AVENUE, AND ADAM, ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
LinkedIn (Authentic Avenue): https://www.linkedin.com/company/68049428/
LinkedIn (Adam Conner): https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamjconner/
Email Adam at email@example.com
Learn more at https://authenticavenuemedia.com/.
Theme Song: Extreme Energy (Music Today 80) Composed & Produced by Anwar Amr Video Link: https://youtu.be/8ZZbAkKNx7s
FULL TRANSCRIPT BELOW: (powered by AI; 100% accuracy not guaranteed; provided by Descript)
Adam Conner: [00:00:00] Relationship building obviously important for any marketer and any CMO, especially this one. Who is it? Well, you're going to have to find out by tuning into this Authentic Avenue.
Okay. Cupid is the brand we're talking to today and specifically their COO Melissa Hobley. Now, like I said, relationship building very, very important. Okay. Cubit knows how to do it well. And so we talk a little bit, just a little bit about dating what it mentioned, 20, 20 and 21, but really we talked today about one of the building blocks of relationship building, which is in communicating.
Generally how to do it effectively, how to do it authentically Melissa and I both have our thoughts on how this occurs within the C-suite and at the COO level. But it's really important when you think about building teams and finding your match personally or professionally. So we go all into that. I think you'll really like this because I believe that Melissa is one of the better communicators out there today because it's just so laid back and not buttoned.
Up, which I have found sometimes in these interviews, but you're not going to get it here. I think it's a really good example of somebody who has not only learned how to run a brand as a leader, but also communicate like a colleague or like a friend. You'll hear what I mean. Let's just get into it. So for now, I'll step back and let you enjoy as I get real with OkCupid and Melissa Hobley.
Hey, Melissa, how are you?
Melissa Hobley: [00:01:33] Hey, Adam, I'm good. How are you?
Adam Conner: [00:01:35] I'm doing well. We're just talking just before we jumped on tape about, uh, communicating well, public speaking, all of this stuff that, that I know a lot about and that, you know, a lot about. And the first thing I want to say before we jump into anything else is that it was striking as I did my research for this interview.
And I researched pretty heavily for a lot of people. When I talk to them, how. Easy. You seem to be able to communicate on the biggest stages and how it differs specifically from some people that I hear who tend to be a little bit more, either buttoned up or just closed off. So I want to start there is that ability to weather?
I don't care if it's public speaking. If this judge generally communicate, do you think that's, do you think that came from like early in your career when you were specifically in comms or working with celebrities and brands, or do you think that's something that. That cropped up over time. And I have a reason for asking this, I promise, but I want to set a foundation here with that.
Melissa Hobley: [00:02:30] Oh, and that's a good question. And thank you for the compliment. I, you know, it's probably a little bit of both. I think, I think one, one thing that drove that was feeling like an outsider. When I came to New York city to go to college, I'm from Muncie, Indiana, and I, I definitely felt like a fish out of water and like, I don't know, uh, like a country bumpkin.
With, you know, I'm like overalls in a gang. I'm sure. I mean, that's how I felt like I was viewed. And so I had to put myself out there in to, you know, to make friends or to feel at home or to, you know, acclimate to New York city. Um, but I think, secondly, I do think I, I, I refine those skills working in PR when I started in college, I also worked in politics on some campaigns when I was in college.
And so I, I think. You know, that helped refine how to connect with people. But I think he was an underlying pin with that. Adam is I, and this totally relates to dating. Is I just, what I know is that most people don't feel totally comfortable and most people are not the confident person that walks into.
This, the speaking thing, the conference, the work, drinks, the office, whatever, and feels like they can talk to anybody. Most people, um, lean out a little bit. And once, you know, everybody feels a little uncomfortable, a little nervous in most of those situations or most of the time, whether that's a bar or a date or a first day in a new job, then you kind of say, oh, okay, well we're all kind of in the same place.
And I, you know, I, I. M. Okay. I am definitely an extrovert and I, I can kinda, I, I, you know, I can say, Hey, I, you know, I used to feel uncomfortable too, or I do too. And you know, let's, let's get on with it.
Adam Conner: [00:04:27] That honesty is something right there that I don't see often we all know. That, that collective exhale happens at the start of any new experience find first day of work, brand new location.
I mean, it happened to me like, you know, when I went to college, didn't know anybody, right. For first day of work was in a completely new environment first day of on any new job, that sort of thing. And I, I don't know how it's sort of intangible, but I, I just wish that people could recognize that collectively more and just get beyond that first.
But you just opened up. I think, you know what I mean?
Melissa Hobley: [00:05:01] Just open up and, and, and when you realize everybody feels that way, then. You don't feel so awkward being like, Hey, cool shirt. I also love that band. Have you, you know, have you seen them live a lot or, uh, for say first day, a new job always feels like the first day of school.
Right. You know? Um, yeah. We really all feel that way. Uh, again, and most people do. And so I, and I like to, because I felt like that outsider and I felt like that in college. And I felt like that when I was working, PR is how I start my career. And a lot of people in PR there's a reputation of you might be wealthy or connected and that's.
It's a, it's probably like journalism and that, that is true because the dollars are small and, you know, you're, you probably have a side hustle to pay rent if you're in New York city or LA or San Fran. So, so
Adam Conner: [00:05:57] yeah. Yeah. It's it's but it's, but it's a fantastic quality in my, my guess. You're going to have to give me a little bit of rope here, cause I don't know for sure.
Melissa Hobley: [00:06:05] I love it. I love a guess.. Go for it.
Adam Conner: [00:06:08] My, my guess is that. This current post at OkCupid, of course, that not your first marketing job, right. You've been in the game for a while, but this PR this has to feel more like home than some of the other albeit illustrious brands. In your resume, right? I mean, because this, this whole business and indeed the entire science of building relationships is based upon that opening up is based upon that honesty and is based upon that ability to reach out and say, Hey, I like your shirt or a, Hey, I like your face.
You know, whatever. You know what I mean? Does it feel more like home here?
Melissa Hobley: [00:06:44] Adam. You're the first person to actually say that or frame it up in that way. And that's really powerful. Yeah, it does. It does feel like home. I, I appreciate you noticing that. And, and it does because yeah, dating is hard, right? It is hard.
Like nobody says, I really love dating. I mean really like who, no one says that
Adam Conner: [00:07:05] It's a challenge. It's something that you got to almost like work up to an, almost like an exercise, you know?
Melissa Hobley: [00:07:11] It is, it totally is an eye. Um, so yeah, it does feel like home. I, I appreciate that. I've never, I don't even know that I've fully thought of it that way, but it, it does, it does feel like that.
And you know, dating is about helping. You know, finding somebody that makes you feel great, no matter what you are, who you are finding that person that's going to be in your corner. And, and that's the job at OkCupid is to tell people, we know it's hard to tell people, but there's someone out there. Like even half as awesome as you imagine how much fun you're going to have together in life, like get through it with somebody in your corner.
And so it, it, it does feel like that. And it's this most awesome mashup of, of. Helping people like take that step of using science and what we know from anthropologists and sociologists and historians and marriage counselors on how people get together and what keeps them together. And what are those real building blocks to relationships.
But then also using. Tech and God, we have the most amazing team of engineers at OkCupid. We're based in New York city and, and, and using technology to make sure we're matching you with, with people that give a shit about the stuff you give a shit about, whether you are, um, trans, whether you identify as non binary, whether you are young, old, religious, not religious.
Uh, you love travel. You hate margarita is whatever it is. Um, it's a really awesome mashup of all that stuff.
Adam Conner: [00:08:51] Well then let me, let me ask you about this, this concept of the match from the perspective of some who listened to this show who not only of course, are looking to find how, how brands operate authentically and how their leaders do so as well, but are also either building their own businesses or would dream to work for somebody like you, or like an OkCupid or like any.
Whatever they envision as like their dream job. How do you ma I mean, is everybody on your marketing team? Like you, and my guess is the answer is no, but how do you find the match as it were for new people to come join you? Cause you've been at this now at OkCupid for about all those four years. Right.
We're nearing on the anniversary. And so I'm curious now that you're a few years in, how, how do you build that team around you and find your own matches?
Melissa Hobley: [00:09:35] That is a really great question and they're not, um, they're not all, uh, like me. It'd be awesome to find people as amazing as I am. I'm just kidding.
Right, right. Um, I think like, you know, there's no, I think any CMO by the way, that tells you they're great at everything is either lying or totally unaware. Um, so I am really good at some stuff and I am not good at other stuff. So I look for people that one really care, uh, uh, really are passionate about, about.
Um, about this space and about how, you know, it's an awesome field to be in. And I look for people that are strong in the areas that we think are going to work. We're getting OkCupid out there. So, you know, um, social is an important place for us. To have a presence. Um, you know, so because you want, it's like, cause you know, Instagram is like a storefront.
Oh, I'm thinking about downloading an app. I don't know which one we know they're going to check us out on Instagram to say, is this like what I'm about? And so I have an amazing person on my team, Devin, who part of her role is. It's figuring out how to bring our voice to life on Instagram. And, you know, it's gotta be funny and it's got to like, but like be a little bit of a gut punch, you know, when you know, you see that meme or something on Instagram and you're like, oh God, that's totally me.
Like, I just want to find somebody to. Sit in sweat pants with all day on my couch. Like that's really what we're all looking for. Um, and so I look for people that compliment what, um, you know, um, what our team is doing and that are good in these certain fields, you know, the way to get into. You know, I think here's what I think is really exciting about, about COVID is, and obviously this is a silver lining COVID has been,
Adam Conner: [00:11:28] I was going to say that's a wild start to a sentence, but I'm rolling with you.
Melissa Hobley: [00:11:31] Well, roll with me for a minute. Um, not to take away from any of the, you know, many of us have had experiences related to, you know, the pandemic, but one of the, one of the silver linings is changing the way we think about work. And even just this morning, there was an article in New York times about Spotify is announcing they're going fully remote.
And so what I'm, what I'm going to tell people also is if, if there's a company or brand or a person or, or a field you want to get into, and you didn't think you could do that, cause you weren't in New York city or the bay area or LA or wherever, um, companies are changing everything about, about where people are working and you may be able to.
To, to join that company or work for home. So, so, you know, um, I think that's going to open things up for, for people that said, well, I don't think I can live in a 400 square foot apartment with my husband and my dog and two goldfish and a baby on the way. Right. And so I think that will change things.
Adam Conner: [00:12:31] I think so, too.
I've been interested in how businesses will return to work. Um, she totally separately from this. I there's another podcast all about that, but that's not, that's neither here nor there. Uh, it's interesting to me because this idea and going back to the first thing we were talking about this ability to like, Communicate effectively must happen right now, completely virtually, which means.
And just as we are exhibiting here on this podcast, the way you speak and, and emote is incredibly incredibly important. So I, um, I think that it is changing a number of ways that businesses are growing, that teams are growing in that leaders. Or manifesting and, and, and coming together. So I want to ask this because I do talk a little bit about authenticity on the show after all it is it's namesake.
And before I ask what I think is a more tired question, you've probably gotten a lot, which is more brand centric. I'll get to that in a second right now. How closely aligned. Do you think the ability to communicate in this effective way as I've just defined, it aligns with being authentic as a leader and how important you think that is for teams who are trying to either grow or stick together?
What do you think about that? Because my take is that it's, it is critical, but I'd like to know yours because I think, I mean, you're one of the better communicators that I've spoken to and that's. That's just true. It's not even a compliment, but I'm curious.
Melissa Hobley: [00:13:58] That's so nice. Listen, I want to hear more about what you think cause you, you are talking to people all day and this is a craft that you've built out
Adam Conner: [00:14:05] I can share my perspective a little bit, but I want to know yours too.
Melissa Hobley: [00:14:08] Yeah, totally. Well, you know, I think, um, I think it's it. I just I'll let me start with this way. It's crazy to me that people get really big jobs and have giant teams of people working for them who are not effective communicators and who don't activate an emotion and who don't, uh, make you feel excited or make you feel like you're on the same page or frankly, even moving in the same direction.
So I think effective communication is so important. I don't think we spent enough time. Thinking about it or learning about I, you don't want as marketers that did not get my MBA, but I feel like my friends have come out of like really prestigious MBA programs are still not great communicators. And, and it's such a, um, it's such an important skill that can, that can bridge so many things.
You know, you may have somebody on your team that is not. Um, delivering performance that you hoped for, or you needed. And actually just being able to communicate with that person can open your eyes to what's going on, or if there's like a challenge that's there. So, you know, I, I'm just, I'm amazed that people don't spend more time on this, and honestly, there's probably call you and have you coach them if they don't know if they're a good communicator, if they want to work on it, if they think they're good, but they can like.
You can always be working on being a better communicator. Uh, so, so I mean, those are just some of, some of my quick thoughts and I just, I just can't believe more people do not think about it. And when was the last time you had a manager? Ask you, Hey, I'm kinda like doing a little assessment here. I want to know if I'm, if you think I'm a good communicator, I've had very few bosses ever asked me that question.
And which shows you that it's, it's just this larger, bigger problem of not being aware, not spending time on it. Like, it's really great if you have a brilliant strategy, but if you've not gotten people excited about that, if they don't feel like they know where they are, if they're, if they don't know where they fit in, if they're not.
You know, marching all towards the same thing, then, then how good is it really? Um, tell me what, tell me more about what you think. What's your, what's your view on that? Well,
Adam Conner: [00:16:23] it's a good mental bookmark versus sitting. And I might want to build out is like, how do I work with leaders to help them communicate better?
Um, because right now it's mostly podcasts, but what? Okay. So my take is that. And it's, it's really weird, but it's almost inversely proportional. These two factors, the size of your business by revenue on an annual basis and their leader's ability to speak as I would define it authentically. Here's what I mean.
Um, enterprise tech, really wonderful space, high growth, lots of money, right? Flashy. Right. They're their CMOs are very, and it's just probably cause they got PR teams and investor relations teams being like, Hey, you don't talk about this, that and the other thing. And so you, you end up having like quite buttoned up conversations and as a result, you can see straight through it.
They have a set of bullet points that they are meant to talk about. Conversely. I have spoken with founders with, with companies that are maybe high growth, where they've got like 20 employees and they, if there's because it's, they don't know any better or because they have no reason to be buttoned up or consistently produce some of the best conversations I have.
And so for me, that is a straight, it's a linear function of which you can then find people who either over index or under index on those two factors. I said at the beginning of this, I think you're a really, really great communicator. Again, it's just what I can perceive because a. I've been doing competitive public speaking since the age of 11 to be, I've talked with like 170, 180 CMOs, and then like, uh, at this point about a dozen chief people, officers in another respect.
So I've heard it all almost in terms of just the way people communicate. I haven't heard all in terms of brand stories, but I've heard a lot there. And I th th that's my specific thinking and.
Melissa Hobley: [00:18:11] I think kind of so interesting. I just, I, that is so interesting. And you know, what you may not appreciate is, is, is very few people are talking to that many CMOs and frankly, we're not talking to them.
Right. Like we don't, we talk to each other, you, you definitely have, you know, people that you go to for, um, for advice or counselor, you know, peers and whatever, but, uh, You know, you should just build out a separate course, Adam, for CMOs to be better communicators. I could recommend a bunch of people right now that should come see you.
Adam Conner: [00:18:43] Yeah. Well, I might, you know, I've been, and I've been another thing, I guess the last, the last thing I'll say about it, which is, uh, you know, cause I think a lot of it starts within as well. Then I'm going to, I'm going to ask you two more questions about, so I'm going to round out this they're to be a little bit, one's gonna be advice-based one's gonna be a little drier.
What I have to ask it is that I just. I might ask you to fill this out too. And, and, and listeners, I'll talk about more about this in the next like month or two, once it's fully fleshed, but I just did a survey with about 50 of those leaders and. While the while now I think it's about 97% of the respondents said that they believe that their broad employee base is either somewhat well or super strongly connected to their leadership.
Uh, only about, uh, oh, that group about 48% of that group in the same survey in, in sequential questions said that in terms of how they believe their employer base. Knows them as a person, rather than just an operator. They either know nothing or they know just the basics. And I think it starts, like, I think a lot of the ways to authentically communicate is to tell your personal story as well.
And it was just such a dissonant response that I received that I was like, okay, There's there's something in that gap and I'm not exactly sure how to address it, but I'm going to do it because you're right. I've talked to more people than most CMOs. We, and I, uh, I just, there's something, there's something there, but anyway, totally.
Melissa Hobley: [00:20:01] We have to be at the, our job is to communicate. Our job is to communicate. My job is communicate. Why should you try OkCupid? To millions of people around the world. If I can't communicate to my team and to the people I work with and my agency partners and my freelancers and, and my researchers, and, you know, the social psychologist, Dr.
Sarah Konrath that I work with at McKinsey and see if I can communicate with those people, then how am I supposed to get paid and be given a really big budget to communicate around the world. So you should totally. You should totally do that. I'll sign up.
Adam Conner: [00:20:39] Great. I appreciate that. All right. So, so then let me run out with these, cause I can talk about that for another hour, but I don't have it.
Uh, I'm going to ask two more questions. One, you've probably been asked a ton. I'll try to put a little spin on it. And then second one's advice. The first one, uh, obviously, you know, uh, Dayton probably changed a ton last year, but now we're we're um, You're starting to crest the hill here, right. People are starting to get shots in arms.
Um, you know, you just, you mentioned to me on the pre that that's something that you're preparing for. I've just recently gotten mine and that's going to change the way that people's at least comfort levels with regard to perhaps dating or at least seeing other people. Uh, have you seen that change in, how do you predict in 2021 that will reflect on services?
Like OK. Cupid, what do you think about that?
Melissa Hobley: [00:21:19] Oh, yeah. And first I'll all zoom out for just a second, which was when COVID drove OkCupid's business up and it, and COVID drove massive increases in engagement for a lot of dating apps, not just us. And you know that you might scratch your head at that. But if you think about the majority of people on dating apps are.
20 and 30 something singles just because there's always, you know, more young, more single people that are younger and OK. Cupid. We're very big in cities. We're very big in New York, San Francisco LA were always one of the bigger dating apps, Berlin, Paris, London, you name it. Um, we are, we are bigger and cities.
And so you're, you know, you're 28 or you're 35 and you're in a city you're not near your family. You're not going to work. You've lost all the social touchpoints and, and. Being on OkCupid, Matt, you could, you could chat with people, you connect with people. And so as a geo went into lockdown engagement on OkCupid, just shot through the roof.
And that means new sign-ups sending messages, sending likes, asking people, um, to do you know, a video date. Um, what is. Going to happen though. This summer is like, well, I mean, we're calling it hot back summer. Um, I didn't coin that phrase. Um, but, uh, you know, summer of love, return dating you sex blowgun, there's a number of.
Super interesting terms out there, but people are skin hungry. People want to physically connect with someone and, and, and the vaccine rolling out, uh, at a pretty fast clip now is gonna make all that possible. So, you know, um, we are very excited about that. We want people to be able to safely date, uh, and make out and go to, uh, Bar, uh, you, you guys even start to go to bars still in New York and LA you gotta eat, you know, you have to order food, you have to sit it's, it's a whole thing.
So, so, um, dating is going to have a very, very big comeback. Um, Looks like that's going to be this summer, but, but there's going to be aspects of dating that will remain with COVID like a video date as a first date that that's, that's not a bad thing. That's a really good thing. Especially, you know, we have a lot of single parents and going on a date means a sitter.
It might mean changing your shifts. At work, it, it can mean a number of things. So if you can have that first date as a video date, that's, that's a good thing. Then you can kind of say, Hey, like, yeah, I'm I'm into this person and let's, let's meet up in person and it's easier to go make those arrangements.
Right. So there's going to be some, some lasting effects on dating from COVID that, that we think are really good. Also people are slowing down they're they're taking their time, like, you know, all these. Women say to me, uh, you know, I feel like these messages and OkCupid are more romantic. Like it's not just, Hey or what's up, or like right there were like really thoughtful.
He went to Machu Picchu, that's on my bucket list. Like how awesome, you know, stuff like that. So, um, So I think the slow dating will be another thing that we see stick around.
Adam Conner: [00:24:25] Well, that's good. Um, I'm a better fan of that. I like, and I got a fiance now we're going to be married in October, but she'd be the first to probably tell you, tell you also that like, I was never good at like short game.
That is never, that was never. My, that was not your first text was like, that was, I was never, I was never went in on the first text.
Melissa Hobley: [00:24:43] did you meet your fiancee?.
Adam Conner: [00:24:45] Oh, we went through work. And so that became, so we were friends for about a year, right before I eventually, and I was, I was at a personal turning point myself. I didn't know if I was going to leave the company move across the country.
I was one of the wanting to pursue acting, you know, at the time I got into performance a little bit like via this, but I took a chance right before I left. I said, well, let me just see if she would've said sure.
Melissa Hobley: [00:25:06] Yeah, I love that. That's awesome. And there you go.
Adam Conner: [00:25:12] And there you go. Okay, here, here. Here's the, here's the last question.
We're going to wrap it up quick and then we'll go. Um, but I do this with everybody and it's sort of like the advice column. The question is people listen to this show and they are, a lot of them are CMOs. It's true. A lot of them lead these brands. A lot of them are brand builders. And again, people who might want to join an OkCupid or join you.
People who generally emulate the paths of those that appear. And as I look into the ways that businesses and individuals carve their own avenues to authenticity, I have to ask you if you have any advice based on your experiences to date, role model stories, how you might advise others on how to carve theirs as we round out.
Melissa Hobley: [00:25:51] I love that question and I, um, this might seem obvious and, but, but it it's, it's the best way forward. Authenticity is what is your story? And if you don't know where to start on that, ask other people ask other people and it could be, and that this goes for your personal brand. It goes for the brand that you're working at.
Maybe you're building out a marketing plan for a new brand or an upstart brand or something ask people, what is it? That's what do you think about when you think about me? Like what would be the first three things that you would, how you would describe me or three things about my story or why I am where I am today and use that as your, as your starting place.
To go. And a super quick example of that is when I joined OkCupid, I was the first CMO there. They had, they had, they, OkCupid was one of the OJI dating apps. They had been around for 15 years. If you can believe it or not, had never had never done an ad campaign. Never, um, you know, barely had an Instagram and a Twitter.
And, and so I just started saying, tell me, what are some things that you think make OkCupid special? And one of his maybe we'll keep you up. OkCupid special was they took a stand on issues. They took a stand and they did that before anybody was doing that and they didn't care about the EMBA hit on revenue.
They cared about. Was this the right thing to do? An example of that was the then CEO of Mozilla Firefox had made homophobic statements. They severed that relationship. Um, now that would not be news at all, but several years ago, people weren't doing that. And, and that was a really good place to say, hang on.
This is authentic to what OkCupid is. And, and how can we tell people we are the only brand that will take the issues you care about and the things that are affecting us in our daily lives and make that a part of the dating experience, which is why we're the only dating app to be able to filter on people that don't believe in climate change.
I don't even know how that's possible, but it is so, or people that didn't vote in the election, aren't planning to vote in local federal or state elections. So. So I would say, you know, figure out what is, what, what are the unique things that make your story or that brand story, and use that as a, as a place, as a place to start.
And most people are not totally aware of that, which is why I say, ask other folks,
Adam Conner: [00:28:11] You know, what's, as you were saying that what I immediately thought of, and it's maybe it's intuitive once you think about it. It's, it's kind of like, Building your profile personally, do you know what I mean? Like, like IRL, you know, like I, you know, what's, what is anybody's own story?
I go, what would mine be? Well, you know, I do a lot of podcasting, public speaking background, you know, good, better performance, but like, and I believe certain things, um, that's mine and listeners, you know, tuning in. I, I bet that you could. Whether it, whether it's and you could, you could do it, like, as we said earlier, whether it's a coworker say, how w how would you describe, how, how do I communicate that sort of thing, a question that is not very often asked.
I agree with that point or whether it's a friend of yours, uh, whether you're building a dating profile, not say, Hey, well, how would you describe me? It's also, I don't know if you've got forgotten this. Most of it. I have, uh, I've gotten an, a job interview myself. People have asked me that question and it's a hard question to answer unless you've prepared.
So it's, it's good practice regardless, but I think, and I agree with you that it will help anybody to build their own their own. Uh, well,
Melissa Hobley: [00:29:12] I think that's totally right. And you're. It is, it is, and it is the same advice. I give people when they're doing their dating app is I say, like, get a mark.
Adam Conner: [00:29:20] Right. I saw, I noticed, I noticed that that was, you know, what, the first things I, so again, I was doing my research and I saw that I saw at least one of the interviews you did that, that started like that on, uh, I D I was looking at that today, when, for instance, I was like, okay, well, and you and you with the crazy thing is you were more laid back in communicating then Hoda was, and the gentleman she was with, I don't forget, I forget his name, but anyway,
Melissa Hobley: [00:29:41] Well, that was so fun.
Oh, that, by the way, that was one of my most fun interviews. I go on the today show semi-regularly to talk about dating and connection and digital era and give people advice or help set people up. I genuinely enjoy doing that. And, um, and that day they had a guest host with Hoda and for the scandal fans out there, it was Fitz from scandal, AK the hot president, um, Tony Mayer.
He was so dreamy and, but talk about being rattled as this person that you're like, oh, he was one of like the, you know, the most buzzed about, uh, stars on TV and genuinely. So, um, kind and generous and looked you right. In the, I worked with celebrities for a long time and they often don't look you right in the eye and make an, you know, it's like the world kind of quiet sound around you.
So I said, you're on live TV. You better get your act together and be able to give people some advice on, uh, on dating. Um, but that was like a particularly fun one. And, uh, yeah. So, um, but Adam, I think that you and I. Um, need to talk about, about getting other people more aware about how they communicate.
You have a real gift to, um, of identifying those, those, um, those patterns. And you're one of the only people out there that's probably talked to as many CMOs as you have. So. You know, w there's a need out there.
Adam Conner: [00:31:01] It'd be a pleasure. Well, we'll talk about it. Do that a little bit of that off Mike will leave listeners to be, uh, in, in the limbo we'll, we'll, we'll it'll have happened.
It probably will, but I'll come back to you listeners a little bit later for this, but for now, uh, most of what a wonderful conversation. Thank you so much for having it. And, uh,
Melissa Hobley: [00:31:15] Adam, thanks so much. This was so fun and, uh, and it was great. It's almost like marketing therapy. That can be like another name of Europe podcast, but thank you so much.
This was really a lot of fun and I so appreciate you having me on.
Adam Conner: [00:31:27] I think that last part building a profile, whether it be personal or professional is really important as well, when it comes to building your authentic self, as soon as you know, those unique points that make you, you, I mean, Hey, how much more authentic than that?
Can you get. Thank you, Melissa, for all of that. And for putting that thought in my head about training with regard to public speaking, something like that, I don't know. I'll continue to noodle, but more importantly for this moment. Thank you to the listener for tuning into this point. If you want to stay tuned with me, here's how you can.
I'm mostly on LinkedIn. It's where I'm doing a lot of my activity. So follow me there, Adam Conner, as well as the show Authentic Avenue or a little over 200 members on that little group. That's where I post all of these shows. Obviously you can also listen, wherever else podcasts are made available to you and on the website, authenticavenuemedia.com/podcast
specifically, if you want to see the page, or if you're just interested as to what I do on a day-to-day basis in helping brands and individuals further, the way they communicate authentically, you can learn a lot from me there as well. Finally, email Adam at that website, Authentic Avenue, media.com. I'd be happy to say hi to there.
But I'll let you go for now. And the next time you'll hear from me is next week, we'll have another fantastic story and another fantastic perspective in this world of authenticity. But until then, I've been your host, Adam Conner. And here I am saying until the next time I get real again with you. Thanks for taking a walk with me down Authentic Avenue.